If you have kids, you know all about that crazy parent-love, especially coming from a mother. I'm not knocking the fathers here, my kids have an incredible Dad, but there's just something about that Mama Bear instinct and unconditional love. You cannot describe it. It's like you think you have a tiny grasp of what love is and then you have a kid and you're like 'Oh! This is TRUE love in it's PUREST form.' It. Is. Awesome.
Anyways, sometimes I find myself staring at my children almost in tears at how beautiful their little souls are and how perfect they think the world is. Now and then the thought crosses my mind, what if something happens to me and I'm not around to show them my love? (Worst-case scenario thoughts come frequently as a parent). Any hoo, with these thoughts I've begun to write letters to my children (hand-written), but I thought I'd give a little glimpse of what they look like. I think one of the most important things a parent can give their children is the FEELING of their unconditional love and support. You can love your kids with your whole body and soul, but if they don't feel it, it's not going to do them that much good. Writing is my natural way of getting feelings out; conversations conveying exactly how I'm feeling are much harder for me. So, here's a letter to my precious 2 year old daughter, Ashlyn.
Ashlyn,
Tonight, after we put Tristan to bed, I asked if you wanted to help me vacuum. You, exclaimed, "YES!" while throwing a fist in the air. (If you could continue this into your teenage years, that would be stupendous)! As I was vacuuming, you were dancing all around the vacuum and running in circles around me in complete and total bliss. It was one of those moments, I thought, 'Wow, my two year old really has things figured out.' If you have that much joy running around a vacuum cleaner, you know what you're doing! I sincerely hope you carry that kind of bright-eyed joy and curiosity with you throughout life.
After vacuuming, I was turning on a movie for us to end our day to (You are now on a Finding Nemo kick, but these change about every 3 days). I glimpsed into my room and you were putting 5 stickers on one of the walls. You put them up, then took them down, over and over again in different lines and patterns. Each time, you were so proud of yourself. I sat watching with an undeniable smile for about 10 minutes. All I could think about was how your world is so perfect right now.
All you cared about were those stickers, they made you happy and you knew you were good at putting them on the wall. No one had to tell you how amazing you were at that. It made me want to put you in a bubble and keep you there forever. I don't want any one to ever put doubt in your mind about the things you can or cannot do. I don't want you to ever feel you need approval from others to feel proud of your accomplishments.
You were so beautiful in these moments, because you were just purely you. Your true beauty can never be defined by the inches around your waist or whether or not society approves of your style. This will be something I will reiterate throughout your whole life, because frankly, the world has produced some messed up images of what "beauty" looks like. I cherish these simple nights with you more than you will ever know. These are the best days of my life. Love you, sweet girl. -Mom, Mommy, Mama.
Now, this was just an average night, but I just loved it so much, I wanted to capture it. I want Ashlyn to look back when she's older and remember, life isn't so hard. Keep it just as simple as putting stickers on the wall. These are the mundane nights of parenthood you just thank your lucky stars you get to be a Mom! Hopefully, she likes my letters when she's older and doesn't think I'm a weirdo, but if she does that's OK too :).
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