Moments

Moments.

All life is, is a series of moments. 

One after the other. One moment you're laughing and then the phone rings and you can't even breathe from the weight of loss that just crushed you. The kind of loss that flips your world inside out and rings out all the little bits of happiness you could hold onto. All you feel is dark. You're reaching for those little bits of light, but they're falling to the floor, drop by drop and your world fades from gray to black. But two and a half minutes ago, you were laughing, eating your lunch and getting ready to go to a Hawaiian party. Now your world has completely stopped and has an ache so bad, you're frozen. Just. Like. That.  

One moment you're hanging on to life by a thread. You have nothing to your name, but a dream. Sacrificing money for happiness has always been enough for you, but it's rough. You're eating Top Ramen, not getting enough sleep, and writing until your fingers bleed. The next morning you wake up, in your rented room, open your mailbox and there it is. Running your hands over that starched envelope paper, your heart rate picks up. You are so eager to open it, but hold off to take a deep breath. It's that moment you can hear your heart beating in your head and you forget to breathe. Finally, you rip the envelope open, quickly, but not as ravenously as you'd like; you can't tear the precious thing inside. It's black ink, on white paper. And with a few blinks of your eyes and a few words read; your life has changed. A publishing deal. You are no longer a person with a dream; you are an author with a book. Just. Like. That.

Moments are life. 

Take people for who they are moment to moment.

One moment we mess up, but the next we sincerely want to make it up to you. One moment we could feel the deepest depths of love and with one passing glance, the next moment holds feelings of betrayal. One moment you could think things possibly couldn't get any better, and the next moment is even brighter than the one before. 

Moment to moment, people are people. 

Feel are there is to feel in each moment and then, just move on to the next. Don't dwell on past moments. Just live in each moment, with an open heart and the world opens up for you. Just. Like. That. 

Some Words You Might Need To Hear

One of my very best friends is pregnant, and I'm almost more excited for her, than I was when I was pregnant with my own kids, almost! Anyways, I know when you're pregnant, there are a million questions floating around your head, all day, every day, like "Can I really do this? How is this baby really entering the world, because it sure as heck isn't really coming out of you know where! And how do I keep an actual human alive?" Along with all the little questions, like, "What's a swaddle? Can I even change a diaper? Where should this baby sleep?" So, I want to share with you, some words you might long to hear, while you're pregnant and the first few weeks with your new baby. 

"The name you picked, is perfect."
I worked in a restaurant, while pregnant, with both of my kids, and I was amazed at the amount of people that gave me feedback about what to name my baby. Complete strangers thought their opinion mattered, when deciding the name of my baby, which their opinion didn't matter, but when your hormones are in full swing, you take what even strangers say, personal. Point being, I wouldn't share the name you choose with any one, because there is ALWAYS going to be some one that thinks there is a better name out there for your kid, but guess what, it's YOUR kid and there is NO better name, than the one that comes to you for your little bundle of joy.

"You are prepared!"
Your mama bear instincts kick in as soon as you are certain there is a baby inside of you. You want everything to be perfect and you want to make sure your baby is coming home to the most prepared nursery there has ever been on the planet. I'm here to tell you, just breathe. You are prepared and if you do actually forget something, there are things called, stores, you can go grab what you need and your baby will survive! You will forget things. My husband and I forgot my daughter's stroller on our first outing as a new, little family and we went to downtown Disney! So he had to carry her car seat all around, all day long. It was pretty hysterical. We felt like complete failures, but looking back, we just laugh! Such a new-parent move. Our daughter lived through the traumatic experience though ;) 

"You look absolutely, radiant."
For real, your body will not ever be how it was before pregnancy. You can drop the weight, work out, and look absolutely magnificent, but it will not be the same body you had before. I truly believe the first month with your new little baby is pure magic. You can't even explain it. Knowing what the experience is like, I seriously, think women look absolutely beautiful while they're in it. Tired eyes, a rounder face, no make-up, pony tail day in and day out, and an exhausted smile, but that smile is so pure and so full of contentment and bliss, it is absolutely breathtaking. Embrace your new body and your new tired self and on the days you don't even want to look at yourself in the mirror, I think, you look absolutely gorgeous! 

"You are so impressive."
The first few weeks are a blur. You'll be delirious, it's pretty painful, and you're learning the ropes, but you will be very impressed with yourself. No one ever tells you how painful it is, because you forget, because you are in a new kind of romance with your baby. But the first few weeks, you're learning to breast feed (which hurts), learning to sleep at odd hours (which hurts your mind), and learning to balance life and a baby (which is confusing). Through all the pain and confusion, you will be entirely impressed with yourself. Your baby will be happy and content, fed and warm, you'll get a few things done, and you'll share moments you can't even believe are real, because they are so beautiful. You're a mom now and I know, you are doing the very best you know how to do each day. If that means you were only able to brush your teeth by 2pm and keep your baby alive today, I am impressed by you and you should be impressed with yourself. Don't be too hard on yourself; you've got this and you are impressive!

"Your husband still sees you as his beautiful, wife."
Remember the center of your universe before your baby? Yeah, not many women do, but it was probably your husband. He helped create this magical little being and took a beating by you and your hormones for a solid 9 months, so try to remember to pay a little attention to him. Through out your child's whole life, it is the easiest thing to forget your significant other, because it's seriously, your human instinct to spend every waking ounce of energy on  the new life you created. You will never want to leave your little humans side, but you must force yourself to spend alone time with your husband. In the end, it's vital to your child's happiness too, because happy parents, make for happy kids. You and your husband will probably go to dinner and all you'll talk about is your new baby, and you'll reminisce about the cute, noise they made that afternoon. That's how pathetic you'll be, but you won't want it any other way. Just remember, your husband still thinks you're beautiful and he needs a little TLC every now and then. 

"This is the best time of your life."
I feel like a lot of internet stories and young folk, who don't want babies at the point they're at in their life, put being a parent down and sometimes, you can start to feel like you're missing out on something, but you're not. Your life is so full of love, a kind of love you don't even know exists until you have a child of your own. The days are long and draining, but you'll look back on them with such fondness, so much fondness in fact, you'll probably make another baby! (Ha). So, try to embrace every moment, the years fly by! If you have a hard day, remember tomorrow is a new one, and you'll long for this time back, when your kids are out on their own! 


Babies have a way of making everything new again and bringing you right back to what's important in life. I think, the most sacred thing we have is time and babies make you spend your time wisely, with lots of loved ones. Just remember, you'll figure it all out and you're doing just fine! 

The Thing About Flaws...

The thing about flaws is everyone  has them and yet, everyone judges people based on them. 

Let's change that.

Flaws are tricky things. Obviously, they aren't good. I don't think anyone has ever been proud of a flaw they have. Unless, you're one of those people who likes to state, "This is who I am, take it or leave it!" That'll get you left real quick! Not that you should feel like you need to change for some one, but there is always room for improvement. And if it's difficult for you to figure out where you can improve--start with your flaws! 

Flaws are usually innate, within us, and hard things to change. 

Two of my biggest flaws are not being able to readily, apologize and being ridiculously, stubborn. I know, aren't those ugly? 

Recognizing your flaws, starting to figure them out, noticing when they pop up--that's owning them and trying to improve upon them. People know their own flaws. They don't need anyone else to point them out or make them feel bad about them, because you know who feels the worst about them? The people who have them! 

Nobody is perfect. So instead of idealizing people who "are" and trying to obtain some unreachable goal physically and mentally, why don't we get more realistic with each other and accept flaws? Then, flaws won't be so scary. It'll be like "Hey, that must be hard. Let's try to fix that together." That is the kind of Kumbayah world I'm envisioning, people! 

Flaws do not define a person. Some of the best people I know in this world, have the worst addictions. There's always a few nicks on a heart of gold, but that doesn't take away from the beauty of the gold. 

Don't miss out on the true beauty of a person, because they have a hard time losing weight, they're quick to a temper, they're stubborn, they're addicted to something, they're workaholics, they're too hard on themselves, or they shut down. Forgive them for their flaws, trust that they are, indeed, aware of them and working on them and enjoy that person and all that is unflawed about them. 

I'm Not Competing With You

I can't tell you how many times I've been running errands, in soccer shorts, a messy bun, some old shirt, and Nike's and have had women throw dirty looks my way. This, especially happens, when I have my kids with me. It even happens from other moms, while their kids are acting like angels and my kids decide to go rogue! And I'm just over it. 

We're all doing the best we can here, people. Maybe you're a woman who doesn't have kids yet and you have all the time in the world to take a leisurely shower, blow dry your hair (I remember those days), put on a full face of make up and sit in your closet, while picking out an outfit. You look great! Every day! And a teensie part of me wishes I could do that, but I can't. 

When I see you in the grocery store, I think, "Wow, she looks nice." I don't glare at you and hope a bottle of Tapatio spills all over your white pants. I complete, not compete. So when you see me, zipping through the aisles, singing weird songs to my kids, to keep them distracted from the fact that we're passing by the candy aisle, and trying desperately to avoid any kind of melt down, but especially the kind with screams that make the whole store stare at us, with a little bit of spit up and God knows what else dried up on my shirt, chipped nails, tired eyes, and a frazzled look on my face...instead of throwing a dirty look my way, can you just force a smile? I'll smile back and it will be a nice moment in time. Plus, you look prettier with a smile, rather than a judgmental wrinkle on your forehead. 

We might not all look the prettiest running around town, but we're all the same, so quit judging if we aren't looking as pretty as you in aisle 9. 

Most days I look like this...

 But if I had time and cared, I could look like this...

Would you treat these two girls the same? I hope so! 

The whole point is, I'm not competing with you. Or anyone for that matter. I don't ever feel better than anyone or less than anyone. We're all just people. I don't care if you drive a fancier car than I do, or ride a bicycle. I don't care if you're carrying a designer bag or a brown paper sack. I don't care what you're wearing, how old you are, how old you look, if you brushed your hair, or if you seem grumpy; I will approach you the same way I approach anyone and that's kindly. Be nice. 

Creating Your Own Luck

I really believe life is all about the small things and actually slowing down to notice when something magical is happening. 

Recently, I went to the movies and while I was in the bathroom, before the movie started, a penny fell out of my pocket. It landed tales side up, which everyone knows is not good luck, unless it's heads up. I thought, some one might kick this thing, it will eventually be on heads and some one will see it, pick it up, and get a good smirk out of the hope for good luck. So, I left the penny on the floor. 

Then, I went to watch the movie. 

After the movie, I had to go to the bathroom again. The same stall I went in, before the movie was available, so I went in. 

And there, on the floor, was my own penny, on HEADS. 

When I left it, it was on tales. I left it with good intentions, that some one else would find that little baby on heads and they'd be happy about it. And it ended up being myself, happy about my own penny. So, ya see, sometimes when you wish good for others, it comes right back to you, faster than you can even imagine! You create your own "luck" and happiness. You just gotta stop to notice it :). 

Unappreciated

I was talking to my fiancé about a post that has been in my head for a while, but I haven't known how to word it correctly. It's about the common theme I've noticed of, practically all women, feeling unappreciated. I brought it up to him and he said, "It's not just women, it's the human population." Whoa! Light bulb! 

So then my wheels started turning and it lead me to these thoughts.

Does anyone on this planet feel the adequate amount of appreciation they think they deserve? I, honestly, don't think one person feels they are as appreciated as they should be, but the thing is, they are probably even more appreciated than they could ever imagine. 

If you're a good person you give to the people around you. You help when you see some one in need, you send flowers when grief has struck somewhere, you lend a shoulder for tears to fall on, you buy your friend lunch, you wash your significant others car, you sew your boyfriends ripped pants, you hold the door open for strangers, and occasionally, you even let people in front of you, while driving, if they have their blinker on. Most people do these things and I think most people end up feeling like it all goes unnoticed. 

Well, I want to tell you; it isn't unnoticed and you will never catch the feeling of complete and utter appreciation that you long to feel. I don't think it exists, so quit chasing it. You take away from the good you're doing. 

People notice you and your sincere efforts to be a good person. It might not be the person you held the door open for, but it could be the person that was in the parking lot and saw you holding the door open, so they held the door open for others, when they entered. 

Do you know how many conversations I've had about my friends, family, and strangers and how much they've impacted me and mean to me? Countless! And I highly doubt any of them know the immense amount of appreciation I hold for every single one of them. I actively try to show them and tell them, but that's the point...people don't pay attention to that. People want to feel appreciated, but when they are shown forms of appreciation, they ignore it, get bashful about it, it's not a big enough gesture to rave about, or they just let it roll of their shoulders and move on with their life. I'm guilty of all of this too, especially with the people closest to me. They'll say thanks and I'll think, "Yeah, whatever, you don't really care." (Haha). But the thing is they do care and are sincere in their thankfulness. 

It's really hard for people to show their emotions. They can want to jump up and down and kiss you, because of the sweet deed you did, but they will hold it in and simply say, "Thank you." So let 'thank you,' be enough.

If people stopped to notice, they would feel more appreciation. But stopping to notice is hard. So if you can't do that, just quit the chase to be acknowledged for all the good you do and just do it. 

People notice.

You are admired more than you know, by people you would be surprised by.

Do good and know you are appreciated. 

Coming To Terms With The Word "God."

I haven't written much about spirituality on my blog yet. Nothing has struck me as important to share about it, because I'm very much in alignment with 'to each their own.' Whatever God fits your life, I think that is the God you should believe in and I am not going to judge in any way, shape, or form.

Well, I recently had a spiritual, self-discovery that I thought was worth sharing. I realized that for the past 10 or so years I had been running from the word "God." I have been spiritual in those last 10 years and am probably the most spiritual I have ever been in my life right now, but if anyone used the actual word, 'God,' in a sentence, I immediately shut down, my mind drifted else where, and I would smile and nod politely, not really hearing anything they had to say. 

Growing up, my family was not devout amongst any specific religion. We went to a Christian church on and off and I knew the story of Jesus and why we celebrated Christmas, but I was never put into a religious box, which I am very thankful for. I feel like it has allowed me to embark on my own spiritual journey and not feel like I am betraying any one in the process.

I have extended family who grew up in a strict church and I went with them every now and again and always left with big eyes and my mouth wide open, because it was strange to me, the way they "worshipped." They had the holy ghost and speaking in tongues and it just felt foreign. I didn't feel connected to any higher being, attending their services and I always left feeling a little uncomfortable and judged. The way they talked about God and everything you have to do to earn his approval to even get the chance to enter those pearly gates. 

Even from this young age, I always had a problem with calling God, "Him," with a capital H. Him, His, He. Why? This isn't some feminist side coming out either, I think I would have been just as confused if God was Her, Hers, or She. How can this all-mighty and all-powerful being be a He? How could he have made the planet and walk around looking like you and me? It just didn't sit well with me. The preachers didn't put me at ease, either. How can this human claim to be so much closer to God than I am? We are both just humans, after all, couldn't I be just as close to God, as him, if I wanted to be? I was just confused. I didn't get God. So I steered away from it and I figured any person talking about God believed in this magical human, sitting in the clouds, judging all of us, so I rolled my eyes and didn't listen. And I didn't listen for years.

But now, I get it. To me, God is the standard of pure, beautiful, kind life that every one seeks to live up to and prayer is the intention of your heart and soul. You can wrap that standard around any Holy book and the belief in Him, you can sit on the waters edge and listen to the waves crash, you can travel to the Holy land, you can get on your knees and say, "Thank you," you can create, you can listen, and you can just be. Just being here is spiritual. 

I listen now. When people talk about their form of God, I listen intently, because any God, is one that encourages love and light and greatness. Why wouldn't I want to hear about how people are finding their inspiration and seeking their greatness? 

I, personally, like to call God, The Universe; encompassing all things and running through all things. I feel God when the leaves blow in the wind, when I see the sunset, when I'm laughing from deep within, when I'm writing, when the Sun shines on my children, when I'm shown forgiveness, when I'm loved when I don't deserve it, when I see kindness amongst strangers, when people give their time to be with other people, when I receive a hug at exactly the right time, when a flower grows through a crack in the concrete, when the perfect song comes on the radio, right when you need to hear it, I could go on and on. For me, I feel God in the little things. And it's the little things that are leaving me feeling complete and satisfied at the end of each day. 

The love and seeking to be better that every human encounters--that is the spiritual journey and it runs through all of us, so if you want to call it God and envision a mighty Man keeping you on course, I think that is noble. If you want to meditate, I think that's noble. If you want to drop to your knees and pray 5 times a day, I think that's noble. Whatever spiritual path you're on, if it's improving your life and your compassion towards others, I think you're on the right track and it's brave, yet peaceful, to stay on that track.

I'm at peace with God. Yours and mine. 

Maya Angelou: A Quintessential Woman.

I woke up today, had coffee, hung out with my kids, and checked my email. BAM! "Maya Angelou passes away at 86." Tears filled my eyes, which, I thought odd, I never personally, knew her, but I felt as if I did. The way she carried out her life, inspired me. She was one of my personal heroes. Each word she spoke and wrote, sunk deep down to my core. I felt as if she got me and I got her. 

I was sad, selfishly, most of all, I always found comfort knowing Maya Angelou was walking around this planet with me. Praying for people, loving people, and spreading her beautiful words and kindness in every day life. I would miss that comfort. And plus, people you admire, you start to think the world could never be, without them. I knew Maya Angelou was old, but she was such beautiful soul, wiser than I thought one human was capable of being, certainly she couldn't pass on, but as life goes, she did. 

I know she wasn't scared of death and she's back with "All," as she put it, but the little writer within me had to pay tribute to her. As Maya Angelou said, "Writers write." So I wrote. This poem is in honor of the magnificent life and impact Maya Angelou had on me and so many others. 

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Quintessential Woman

Her skin is soft, her words strong

She has an undeniable essence that lives on

She moves people like the sea

A force so harshly powerful, yet serene

Her smile lit up this world

Causing people's evils and doubts to unfurl

They blew away in the wind

And people found their hope again

This, once caged bird, was a force to be reckoned with

Love and kindness, she made her life's pith

She turned her cage to gold

And it became priceless, nothing anyone could hold

Lessons she taught

Virtues she sought 

She was, but one woman

One woman, who stood in her conviction

Never too old or too wise to listen

One woman, who brought about change

Humanity and compassion were never estranged

One woman, who lived her life so elegantly

And saw herself in you and me

One, phenomenal woman, indeed

Our hungry hearts and souls, she helped feed

One phenomenal woman, was she.

-------------------------------

I would say rest peacefully, but I know she isn't resting. She's zippin' around, spreading some other goodness else where and she will be greatly missed down here. 

My favorite Maya Angelou quotes:

"This is a wonderful day. I've never seen this one before."

"Try to be a rainbow in some one's cloud."

"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."

"My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style."

"When you know better, you do better."

"If you get, give. If you learn, teach."

I could honestly, go on and on. This woman amazes me. Here's to Maya Angelou!!!

I'd Rather...

I've been told I'm an old soul and I'd have to agree. I don't really know if I'm all that wise, but I do long for the days of old. When it seemed like hard work paid off and family came first. People weren't in the race to self promote and they saved energy and money by hanging laundry on a line and mowing their own lawns. (I seriously registered for a laundry line from Macy's for my wedding; I was also really delighted to see you could even buy one of those these days!)

Anyways, I got to thinking; while I can appreciate our awesome technology and all the ways it does good in the world and keeps people connected (Helloooo Facetime! That is a beautiful thing), I feel like I'm poisoning my children's concepts of the world with a phone in my hand at, almost, all times. And I'm one of the people aware and making a conscious effort to cut back and it's still TOO much. If my daughter sees my phone laying around, she immediately brings it to me, which makes me sigh, a very sad sigh. 

Technology is a real dilemma, especially with raising kids. "It's the new way of the world," "You'll do more damage not allowing them to learn the new technology and they could potentially fall behind in school," "Lots of computer programs are for learning." Blah, blah, blah. When I look around, I see kids with too much energy, no respect, and the latest gadget. I'm going to chance it with my kids. I'm going to downgrade my plan and upgrade my life. And with these thoughts; I wrote this...

I'd rather my kids see my giving a hug, instead of a 'Like.' 
I'd rather them see a book in my hand, instead of a phone or kindle.
I'd rather them see me on a landline, enjoying a conversation and actually laughing out loud, because I am overcome with joy from speaking to a person I care about, instead of curled up on the couch texting 'LOL,' when I really just smirked. 

I'd rather my children see me feeling the wind on my face, instead of my face illuminated from the nearest electronic. 
I'd rather them enjoy a car ride; the scenery, maybe a few wrong turns, instead of following the voice from my phone and getting there without any unexpected "problems" or fun.
I'd rather run out of gas and my kids witness the kindness of strangers helping refuel our car or push us to the side of the road, instead of sitting there, with phone in hand, shutting out any opportunity for help, while waiting for some one I know. 

I'd rather them look out the window and day dream, instead of being glued to a screen shrinking their imagination. 
I'd rather my kids still be capable of feeling compassion and know they can actually hurt some one physically and verbally, instead of being numb to their own feelings and others.
I'd rather them see me relaxing; actually relaxing, instead of trying to constantly keep up with things that actually do not matter. 
I'd rather them see their Dad get sunburned shoulders from mowing our lawn, instead of watching strangers pull up and unload gardening tools from the back of their truck.

I'd rather my children actually plant something and get a little dirt under their nails and run outside everyday to see if their seed has sprouted, instead of having cyber plants that grow ten feet in two hours. 
I'd rather them have memories of the smell of fresh clothes hang drying in the summer breeze, instead of the dryer constantly running. 
I'd rather them come inside at the end of a long day with messy hair, skinned up knees and elbows, and not smelling too good, because they explored, instead of looking prim and proper and having some name brand clothing on that isn't allowed to get dirty.
I'd rather them wait patiently while I try to make a meal, even if it doesn't taste the best, it'll have love spattered all over it, instead of driving through and getting a quick dinner that leaves their stomachs and hearts empty with no dinner time conversation. 

I'd rather my kids look around, enjoy real life and the people they are surrounded by everyday, instead of living a life with no peripheral vision. 

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Let's bring back life's simplicities and soak them in. We only have one life, you'll be sad if you spend it looking at a screen. 

Things Paris Taught Me

I spent the last week of March in Paris, France! It was a once in a lifetime experience for lots of reasons, but the primary one being the people I traveled with! I got to go to the ol' City of Love with my mom, my grandma, and my cousin Jessica. I wouldn't have wanted to experience it with anyone else, it was amazing! There were lots of laughs, naps, smiles, shopping, feasts, drinks, and sights! 

I appreciate every new experience, especially with family, and even more, especially with my grandma. Though, my grandma may be the youngest, most vivacious heart I know, there is no denying that the years are passing. I want to make sure to embrace all the time I can with that magnificent woman (along with the other two spectacular women I traveled with). 

While enjoying the sights and tastes of Paris, with my wonderful company, I actually took away some lessons, reflecting back on the trip, so I thought I'd share them. 

1. It is SO NICE to truly DISCONNECT from technology.
While, I can appreciate the beauty of everything at our fingertips and the ability to fly to Paris for a week, I often long for the times of old. With real newspapers, people mowing their own lawns, and phone calls. I didn't have my phone in Paris and it was just what I needed. I'm cursed with the picture aspect of technology. I feel like I have a good eye for photos, so my thought process is like "Oh, that'd be a nice pic." And if it turns out to be a good picture, my next thought is, "Oh, I should share and post this." (It's no help having cute kids either, I want to post every picture of them, ever!) It was so nice to take pictures with an actual camera and not even think twice about sharing what I was doing. I was living in the moments, without worrying about capturing them.

2. Moms need to feed their souls too!!
Obviously, leaving my kids for 8 days was no easy task. I was very anxious an entire week before leaving and the undeniable "mothers guilt" set in when the flights were officially booked and I felt it all the way through until I returned. No one can put them to bed, give them baths, and love them quite like their mama can. There's a very important aspect of motherhood that NO ONE pays attention to and that's a mother's happiness and SELF. How many moms do you know that completely lost themselves in their children? It's the easiest thing to do, because your kids turn into your ENTIRE life and we wouldn't want it any other way, but I think it's vital for a woman to keep her identity outside of "mom." 

Traveling is something that feeds my soul. New sights, new people, new tastes, and experiences are all things that get me giddy inside. Roaming the streets of a completely foreign city and seeing everyday things, like buildings, cars, and trees, through new eyes revitalizes my being. Now, I'm not jet-setting off every month away from my family and probably won't be crossing the pond again for quite some time, but traveling is most definitely something I need in my life. Not to mention, uninterrupted sleep and naps when I pleased were just as nice as well :). 

Point being, if you're a mom and traveling is something you've dreamt of doing; do it! I'll say don't feel guilty, but we all know, the mothers guilt is something built in our DNA, but really try to enjoy your time away and make the most of it and appreciate how lucky you are to have little ones to greet you when you return. The happiest of moms, make the happiest of families, so make sure you're doing things that solely make you happy, every now and then. 

3. Portion size matters.
While in Paris, I feel like I ate more bread in a week than I have over the past three months. I'm not a huge bread eater, unless it's a sandwich or a piece of peanut butter toast in the morning. In Paris, they just order bread and cheese for breakfast and toast comes with everything, as well as bread baskets. Not to mention, all the pastries and crepes that are in your face every few blocks. I savored the tastes of Paris and I think that food is an essential part of travel. Each place has a unique taste, so EAT. Eat and don't feel bad about it. 

I never noticed any obese people walking the streets of Paris and all they eat is bread. What the heck? It's because their portions are the right size and they walk everywhere. Our entree plates were about the size of appetizer plates in the United States and we were always full afterwards, but if they had given us more, I'm sure we would have eaten it. So, ol' Paris solidified a thought I already had; eat smaller amounts of whatever you want and take the stairs now and then. All the diet plans and 'lose weight fast' schemes give me a headache. Just eat smaller portions and move your body.

Reflecting on a vacation is eye-opening. There are always new things to learn and appreciate. 

If anything, the best thing I realized is smiles really are universal and most people are nice in this world, despite reputation or preconceived judgements. 

Here are some snapshots of my time in Paris---

The Annoying Thing Called Patience.

Ever wake up mad at the world? I think we all have those days and this is definitely one of them for me. I can usually count on Sundays to rejuvenate me and put me at ease, but today I woke up with angry vengeance for no reason. 

I was mad that my family is living in an apartment. I was mad that I don't have a job that makes money and helps with our financial situation and goals. I was mad that I'm so far away from my parents and brothers. I was mad that I don't have a car during this time to, at least, experience the city, I feel stuck in, with my kids. I was just mad at everything! 

I escaped, to Starbucks of all places. I used to be so anti-Starbucks. I hate how "trendy" it is to be carrying your Starbucks coffee, along with your Prada purse. It's practically everything I don't want to stand for. But the actual coffee shop, with adults sitting in it, conversing, drinking their coffee, reading their books, and perhaps chasing their dreams, makes me happy. I like being around people and Starbucks does create a calm atmosphere to be in. So for that, I commend you Starbucks! 

And here I sit. In Starbucks, with my medium sized (whatever that's called in this world, I cannot remember) Vanilla Latte and the word patience is ringing in my head over and over and over again. Patience is a virtue is an understatement! Patience is the freaking key to almost everything, I'm learning. How many people do you know that have had some AMAZING idea, but once it's not recognized instantaneously, they drop it and move towards their next brilliant idea? How many inventions are piled up in people's garages? How many books laying around never sent off to the publishers? 

We need patience. You put in the work, you send it out there, and then instead of reaping the benefits, you know what you do, you keep on working. Every, single day, with focused attention. You work and work and work and be patient, because eventually, when the time is right, whatever you're focused on will blossom and you will reap the benefits. It doesn't happen on our time though, it happens when it's supposed to happen. 

I'm learning to maintain the focus. I am one of those people that gets about 5 new ideas every single day and it's confusing, because I can see every single one of them working out, being successful, and helping people, but none of them are going to come to life if I don't narrow it down and figure out what the heck I'm doing. 

So I've narrowed it down to this; writing. This year, I'm going to simply, write. I'm going to write my little heart out, because that's what my heart wants to do. I will write all my ideas down, but I'm not pursuing them. The only thing I'm pursuing with reckless abandon is writing. Who knows what will come of it, maybe nothing, but I will know that I was patient with one thing and worked endlessly towards it. 

So now, I am patient, well learning to be patient. Probably the hardest lesson I'm learning. I will be patient and know, my dream house is coming, my family car is coming, my mom, dad, and brothers will be closer one day, and I will make money doing what I love when the time is right. All we can do is work hard and have patience.

So cheers, with my Starbucks coffee, to having the patience to pursue our dreams, one at a time! 

Finding The Courage to Do Good

One of my new year's resolutions was to actually compliment strangers when I pass by them and think, "What a cute scarf!" or "Love how she did her hair!" Who doesn't love to hear they look nice? I've always been too shy and embarrassed, for whatever reason, to give strangers a compliment. Even when I'm with my good girlfriends, half the time, I think of a compliment while conversing with them, like, "Her eye liner looks so good today," and I forget to actually say it. Anyways, I've been working hard on saying it. 

Then, I realized, I can take this to the next level and do it. I can be a doer, whenever the opportunity presents itself. Brene Brown, author of The Gifts of Imperfection and Daring Greatly (and another book, I don't have), inspired me! I saw her on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday (Sorry if you're an anti-Oprah peep, but I think she's great) and I am obsessed with this show! I am enlightened every Sunday, it's awesome. Brene Brown was on and talking about vulnerability and how it is actually the door that leads to everything. Being some one who has always had a hard time feeling vulnerable in any situation, this really resonated with me and made so much sense! I could go on and on about all the awesome input about life she shared, but the main thing is you need to be vulnerable to get to courage and courage can take you places you can never, even imagine! 

So, then I found myself leaving the grocery store parking lot. It was pouring rain here, in Austin, Texas. There was a man walking through the parking lot and I could tell he had no place warm he was headed to. The rain was just pounding him in the face and I just drove right on by. Then I looked down in my driver's door pocket and saw an umbrella. I thought, "Gosh, I should have offered him that. Oh well." And I drove a little further. Then, I thought, "NO! This is an opportunity. Opportunities come in little moments and that was a moment you just missed!"

 So I turned around looking for the guy and it was like he disappeared! So then I thought, "Crap! I just totally failed a test the universe threw at me. That was some angel and I suck as a human being!" But then, thankfully, I saw him! He had started to head through some trees and I zipped up by the curb and started yelling, "HELLO!!" He turned around and headed towards my car, I held out the umbrella and just said, "Do you want this?" He was so shocked. He replied with, "Are you serious?" "Yes, I don't need it." Then his eyes lit up and he said, "We need more people like you." Then he walked off with his umbrella opened, shielded from the rain :). 

Ahhh, yes! Courage for the win!! Now, I'm not telling this story to get a pat on the back, I'm just telling it, because even though, I was very nervous and uncomfortable, basically following a homeless man, I made myself vulnerable in that moment and ended up with the courage to offer him an umbrella and hopefully made his day a little better. 

I feel like, everyone (especially, me) thinks there is going to be some big moment to prove themselves as a great human being. Some heroic circumstance, where you prevail, but that's not the case. It starts in very small instances, in your everyday life. And you know what the awesome thing is? You make some one else's day better, but you actually feel great about yourself  as well. It makes you feel so good, that you want to do more of it! And then bam! All of a sudden, you're a great human lending a hand left and right and making your immediate world a better place and inspiring others to do the same and it just snowballs! 

So the point is, be vulnerable and be courageous. Work on it. They are not innate features; they are attributes we need to work on. Happy Monday, Bring the Happiers :). 

Things I Know For Sure

It's easy to get all caught up in a thing called 'life.' To let other people's standards morph into your own and stray from the core of who you are or who you want to be. It's hard to be mindful every day about your life. Lots of us get caught up in just going through the motions. 

Sometimes it's nice to just take a minute and write down things you know for sure about yourself, your life, and where you want to be. You know, just reaffirm yourself, who you are, and what the heck you're doing and why you're doing it. So here is my list of things I know for sure, at this point in my life, this list could be completely different come tomorrow, because that's how life is! 

1.Being a mom, and a good one at that, is my best accomplishment and probably will be for the rest of my life.

2. A sunset never gets old.

3. The word "fag" has no room in my vocabulary and makes me cringe when spoken by others. Yeah, I'm one of those people.

4. I will never be a morning person, even when I have my little humans waking me up at the crack of dawn, I am not fully awake and aware until about 10 am. 

5. I'm a summer girl. Warm breezes, the smell of a body of water, and tan lines will always make my heart flutter.

6. Putting my spirituality in one religious box doesn't work for me.

7. I am so fortunate for my wonderful family. Cousins, brothers, parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles. These people have been the highlight of my life. 

8. Profanity will never just roll off my tongue. Sometimes I wish it would, but it is just so unnatural for me. I don't know why. 

9. Classic Rock-n-Roll will always remind me of riding in the car with my Dad and iced-tea will always remind me of my Mom. 

10. Nature is my church. A good hike and breath of fresh air makes me feel connected.

11. Avocado and or garlic powder make everything extra delicious. 

12. Gratitude's the attitude! Being grateful really brings more into your life. It's almost like science, it really works!  

To sum it up: love, family, and gratitude are three things I'm absolutely sure of, this far in my life.

Oh, and tulips are my favorite flower. I know that for sure too :) 

What do you know for sure?